Oct 21, 2010

One Year Ago

One year ago today after watching for several weeks as my mom slowly slid away from us, she passed away.  It had been nearly 2 weeks without literally a bite to eat and days without s much as a sip of water.  It had been horrific to watch as the strongest, proudest woman I have ever had the pleasure to know was slwoly robbed of every bit of her dignity as she fought courageously for every last breath.  When she passed, there was sadness certainly but there was also so relief in knowing she was no longer in pain.  But now a year later when the visions of her suffering not QUITE so clear anymore, the pain of MY loss is much clearer.  My mother was my best friend and the best grandmother to my kids, I could have asked for.  The pain of knowing she will miss so very many milestones of the boys she loved so dearly sometimes seems unbearable.  But then I gather my strength, the strength that SHE gave to me and I keep going.  I would give anything to have her back with us, healthy and happy.  But since that is simply not reality, we pick up and keep moving, for it's exactly what she would have wanted.  And know that she is still with us for all thos milestones, just not in the way I wish she could be.

Below, is the obituary that was printed for my mother, with just a few details removed for privacy.
Deb, 58, of  IL, took her last steps on her journey to be with the Lord on Wednesday, October 21, 2009 after a long courageous battle with breast cancer. She was born in 1951 to Frances B in Idaho. She moved with her mother and brother to WI as a child where she grew up and graduated from B High School. Deb made many friends as a long time employee of ComEd. She later spent many years as the President of  Electric, Inc. 

She was an avid Cubs fan who also loved shopping and sewing. She cherished time spent with her family at her home for holidays and get-togethers. She especially loved "S days." Deb spent many years learning, serving, growing and laughing with friends and family at Community Church. She was a dedicated supporter and volunteer of the American Cancer Society's Relay For Life in hopes of helping to find a cure for the disease she so bravely fought. 

Deb and John were joined as one and began to build a house and home when they were married on April 30, 1988, and began to walk a journey with the Lord together. John hopes she will always be remembered for the wonderful love and open heartedness she always shared with him. 

Deb will be dearly missed by children Lisa (Tom) and Philip (Jodi). Words cannot describe the feelings of loss. However, we realize this separation is only a temporary one. Phil would like to remember her for her keen sense of humor, her warm smile and her honest advice given when needed. He would like to thank her for being there for his dad over the years and in his times of need. Lisa will miss countless things about her loving mother and best friend but none more than the sound of her voice and the phone calls just to talk. She hopes that she will be remembered for her inspiring courage and her unending love. 

She was the "best grandma in the world" to Rebecca, Stacie, Megan, Andrea, Timothy, Joshua, John, Faith, and Bryan. Her grandchildren enjoyed spending time with her and sharing in her interests and hobbies. 

She was greeted in Heaven by her mother, Frances B; her brother, Dennis B, and several in-laws. The family would like to thank the staff of Palliative & Hospice CareCenter for their open hearts in caring for Deb in her final days.


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