Mar 15, 2011


With all the loss I feel like our family has endured over the last five or so years, I am still a little overwhelmed by some news this evening.  It seems I've become known as the one typically in the know about many things in my circle of friends.  From places to go to current events, to knowing what our high school classmates are up to, it's not uncommon to get emails, texts or facebook messages from friends looking for info.  This evening I got a text from a friend wanting to know "what happened" to one of my ex's. After replying that I wasn't even sure what she was referring to I immediately received a text from my ex's sister in law asking if I had heard that he'd passed away. I was so shocked that my first response was a simple, "No!"
This ex and I haven't been together for almost 10 years but I've stayed very close to his family all this time.  I am truly in shock that this 32 year old husband and father to two young children could just be gone.  We were together for many years and was a big part in who I am today but I am still a little surprised by how much this has shaken me.  I wish I could be there to support his family which I love very much but the services will be several hours away and I am pretty sure I would not be welcome even if I could make it. I am close to his parents and siblings but his wife is NOT a fan.  She has made that very clear.
I am now wondering, do I still send flowers? I sincerely believe she might even be upset by this but I want to show the rest of his family that my thoughts are with them. Any thoughts?


  1. You know, I would. Even if you send them to his parent's house rather than where the funeral is taking place or his family's house. I'm sure they'd appreciate your condolences. (((hugs)))

  2. I agree with Blessings. I would send flowers to his parents' home and perhaps call his mother to offer condolences.

  3. I wouldn't send flowers, because his wife might take it the wrong way and just throw them away anyways. Just silently say a prayer and you can always donate something in his name or send flowers to his parents.

  4. Send a heart felt card to his parents. The point of services is to show respect and support to the loved ones of the deceased. You are close with his parents, therefore, that's who you support during this sad and difficult time.
    Blessings to his family!


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