It's about my mom. She really isn't doing well and from the sounds of it, from my (step) dad, she will likely be stopping her chemo. Her next appointment with her Dr is Tuesday and as of last night I guess she's wanting to be done. To be honest, I don't blame her. I truly don't know that I would have had the strength to fight this long. Especially given the way she works sooo hard to not let on to anyone how much she's really hurting. But it makes things very hard because she won't open up to me. It's gotten a teeny bit better lately and she's started to let me know that she feels poorly and that she's truly frustrated with the "life" she's living. But she hasn't opened up to me about what she's really thinking or wanting. And I guess I just haven't been brave enough to prod a whole lot. I can't begin to imagine the things that must be going on in side of her head. I know her well enough to know that she is worrying too much about everyone else. But I don't know exactly how to let her know that by trying to "protect" us she's really making it harder to process this whole thing. Not trying to sound selfish at all. I know she's going through more than anyone should have to but I just really wish that she would be open to including her whole family in this (crappy) process. In case, I haven't mentioned it, I HATE cancer.
Sorry to be a downer today. Unfortunately, that's just how I feel.
Praying prayers of peace and wisdom for you and your family. I can understand how frustrated you must be.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry your mom isn't doing well. I hope she starts to open up a little more with you and that you can both share your heart on things together.
ReplyDeleteI HATE cancer too! I watched the woman that was just like my mother die from it four years ago and it was the hardest thing I've ever been through.
ReplyDeleteYou and your mother are in my prayers! If you wanna talk you know my email address!
Hugs
My prayers are with you! We are in the same situation with my father-in-law who is in the end stages of lung cancer. I went through this also with my sister several years ago. It is never easy but God is with you through it all! ((HUGS))
ReplyDeleteWhat a tough situation for everyone. I will pray for your family and your mother.
ReplyDeleteThat is tough, and scary. We will keep you in our prayers. Never feel as though you can't share the bad times with all your blogger friends, we want to support you in the good and the ugly.
ReplyDeleteThat is tough, and scary. We will keep you in our prayers. Never feel as though you can't share the bad times with all your blogger friends, we want to support you in the good and the ugly.
ReplyDeleteI'm sending prayers and good thoughts to you and your family.
ReplyDeleteAwe. Don't apologize. You have every right to feel how you do. I hope things start to look up for you soon. {{{hugs}}}
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for what is going on, I am praying for God's will and that He will provide you all strength and comfort during this time. I too HATE cancer my grandmother died of it several years ago and it's such an awful sickness. Sending you lots of {{HUGS}} your way.
ReplyDelete((hugs)) I am so sorry she is going through this and your whole family for that matter cancer affects everyone even if undirectly.
ReplyDelete(((Lisa & Mom))) Don't ever apologize for posting what you feel and what you're going through. We, the collective semi-anonymous masses, are hear to listen and giv eyou support.
ReplyDeleteI just found your blog today. I love it, but am so sorry to hear about your Mom. She is in my prayers, along with you.
ReplyDeleteYour boys are GORGEOUS! I love finding blogs of other working moms (outside of the home working that is).
Hope things get better!
Lisa,
ReplyDeleteYou Mom as well as your entire family is in our prayers. I lost my grandmother to cancer not long ago. She was just the last of many family that we have lost to this disease.
She fought like your Mom for a really long time. She was 92 years old and was able to make it thru many chemo treatments even though at her age the advised against it. My mother told me that it wasnt really until she told my grandmother that everything was going to be ok and that they would be ok without her that she actually stopped trying to protect them (my aunts and uncles, her children) and just opened up to them about how she felt and why she felt the way she did. They were able to talk about many things together that made the process so much easier on my mom. You might have read in some of my previous post, one day (the actuall day she went to be with the Lord) my mother asked my grandmother how excited she was about getting to see blackie. This was my grandfathers nickname he passed of cancer years before her. My grandmother responded "I want to see Jesus".
Let her know that you are going to be ok. It might be of help as it was to my grandmother.
Love and Prayers to you Always,
Tim
(((Lisa))) Still praying for your mom.
ReplyDeletesending tons of prayers your way!
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry :(. Cancer SUCKS!
ReplyDeleteOh, sweetie, I's so sorry you're going through this--and sorry that your mom is going through this. It's sooo hard and feels so final.
ReplyDeleteI'll be praying for you guys.
Lisa,
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry that your mom and the rest of the family are going through this difficult time. My thoughts are with you...
hey hunni,
ReplyDeleteim SO sad to hear about your mom
:( i dont really know the words to say to comfort you during this BUT i would suggest gently prodding her to talk about things, and explaining nicely to her how you're feeling about everything.... because maybe she DOES want to talk about things but feels guilty about doing so. But I really would consider doing this because when her time does come to go up to Him, you dont want to have any regrets, ya know? i'll keep you guys in my prayers...tell aunt debbie i love her! xoxo Megan
Im praying for all of you.
ReplyDelete